Why is this process so different from what I went through?
The traditional model of confirmation preparation is simply not working. The Dynamic Catholic Institute reports that 85% of confirmed teens will leave the faith within 7 years. St. Gabriel greatly desires more for our teens and families. We modified our confirmation preparation to evangelize and to encourage this generation of young people to own their faith. This process is relational and impactful.
I live far away from the candidate. Can I still be their sponsor?
Absolutely! Yes! They have asked you to be in this wonderful role with them. What a privilege! This process is designed to be done in-person. However, with technology (ZOOM, Facetime, etc.) these meetings are possible. We encourage ZOOM (or similar) so you can share images and watch videos at the same time. The Youth Ministry Staff will be available to help with any technology. When you come in town for a special occasion, it is a great opportunity to meet in-person for a milestone or activity with your candidate. (Keep in mind that you must has to be physically present with your candidate at the Confirmation Mass.)
When are we supposed to have this completed?
There is no specific deadline given to families from the Youth Ministry Staff for confirmation. We offer two Masses during the year for candidates to receive the Sacrament of Confirmation, one in the spring and one in the fall. Sometimes a family may wish to choose a certain day for Confirmation and work towards that date. In this case, the sponsor and family should set up the meetings with this in mind remembering that this confirmation process is designed to encompass about nine months (school year).
Our family (candidate and sponsor) schedules are packed! How do I find time to meet with them?
This is one of the hardest challenges of this process. Our lives are packed with so many things. This is one of the reasons why this is a self-paced program. Get creative with the calendar. Meet for coffee or a shared meal somewhere. The most common joy reported from this process has been the relationship created between the sponsor and candidate. It is worth the time.
I don’t know how to start or what I am supposed to be doing.
Because this is such a great question, we created its own webpage. Please check it out.
Sponsor Training Webpage
As a sponsor, I don’t know enough about the faith to teach them. Can I be a sponsor?
Even if you feel like you don’t know enough, you can still be a sponsor! They have purposefully chosen you to have these engaging conversations and to build a lasting relationship. In each milestone, you will find many training materials to equip yourself with the information needed to dive into conversation. If you both find yourself asking the same question, look it up together! It is ok not to have all the answers.
My candidate seems to know very little about the faith in our conversations. What do I do?
Our teens vary dramatically with their knowledge of the faith. For some candidates, this is their first experience in the faith. This makes your role as sponsor a wonderful privilege! You will discover that your conversations with your candidate may involve a little more teaching surrounded by questions about their reaction to the material. For example: How do you think your age would react to this information? What do you think about this topic? Our training materials for each milestone will include suggested questions and material to help you navigate the content.
I am not technologically savvy. How do I show these pictures and videos to them?
The multimedia involved in these milestones are critically important. Many times, they are used to get the conversation started and sometimes it is the main source of dialog. Watching these videos, viewing images, and working with a PowerPoint presentation are all parts of this experience. If you are meeting in person, we recommend the sponsor bringing a laptop with them. You need access to the internet. Links are in your email (to get links to milestones). The Milestone webpages will have it all for you. If you are an out-of-town sponsor and are meeting virtually, we highly recommend ZOOM (or a similar platform). These applications will allow you to have conversations while sharing an image or watching a video together. When in doubt, ask your candidate for help. Our teens today are extremely talented when it comes to multimedia.
How do I know where I am in the process?
Since this is a self-paced process, it may be easy to forget where you left off. In order to help our candidates and sponsors, we will send reminders every couple weeks to the sponsor and to the candidates parents. These reminder emails will contain the links needed as well as instructions on how to proceed.
These meetings have been tough. I find myself teaching more than engaging them in a conversation.
One of the hardest things to do as an adult sponsor is to resist the urge to teach. It is natural to be concerned if you find yourself in this situation. Keep in mind that this process is more focused on the heart (relationship) than on the head (knowledge). If we can affect a person’s heart, the rest will come. Ask open-ended questions that require more than just a yes or no. Slow down in the presentation, present an idea, and then ask them what they think about it? How do they think someone their age would react to it? You will find that the training materials will help in preparing for the next conversation.
Our conversations have been great! Can I get more information on the Milestone to go deeper with them?
This is the GOAL of this confirmation preparation program. You and your candidate have developed an environment where the teen (and sponsor) feels comfortable sharing and feels listened to and heard. The recommendation on how to go deeper is largely dependent on the teen themselves. Sometimes encouraging the teen to journal about their experience with the faith is attractive to them, maybe encouraging reading a spiritual book together, or learning more about one of the prayer practices found in Milestone #2. Another idea may be to share the “Need to Brush Up” material that is developed for the sponsor (adult level material) to the candidate.
Are there more Milestones? We don’t want to stop meeting.
While there are only 7 Milestones, the journey of faith never ends. We greatly encourage continued conversations after they receive the Sacrament of Confirmation. Find out what they want to learn more about and research together. The Youth Ministry staff is here to help!